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July 18, 2007

Today's Bush Joke Humor & Fun

Imagine my surprise when I come back to work and find out that the president of the United States commuted Scooter Libby's sentence. How little does the president care what you think about that? [on screen: Bush saying it was a "fair and balanced" decision]. He's literally just using Fox News' slogan now. Here's the thing about the phrase "fair and balanced" — the president means it just as much as Fox does. But obviously the top story while we were gone had to be the war in Iraq. As you know, we are now entering our fifth year of making very good progress in Iraq. Obviously, the president defining progress now as "moving forward through time." But this spring, Congress finally asked the president for some specifics about our progress and its level of goodness. They required him to submit regular reports, and our first report card is in [on screen: Bush saying the Iraqis have made progress on eight of 18 benchmarks]. Yes! There you have it — eight of 18. Otherwise known as a "Gentleman's F." — Jon Stewart

Posted by Jonathan at July 18, 2007 10:44 AM  del.icio.us digg NewsVine Reddit YahooMyWeb